Just about me.

I have been reading a couple of books lately, one about a woman's anger and how to handle it, and the one I started now has given me great insight. It is called The myth of Submissive Christian woman, my husband is sleeping right now, otherwise I would double check the name, but it is something along those lines. I did not grow up in a Christian home. I did not see a submissive role model, so I really have a small clue about what it is. I have realized that it does not mean that I cannot be me, which is what I think I have been doing wrong. I try really hard to do what my husband asks me to. Keep in mind that there is no illegal requests, for mans law or Gods law, but some very tense situations arise because I just go along and I have always felt that what I wanted did not matter. I know that if I approach the subjects with a gentle heart and word that maybe my opinion will matter. I also have to remember that the only male role models my husband has are the men at church, and we all know men do not talk like women do, so how does he ever see how to love me unconditionally, as I am to respect him unconditionally. Anyway, this is something I have been thinking about. Also, I do not talk of the anger book in this very much because the whole time I read it, I was thinking that my husband really needs a book like this. I am not trying to be disrespectful, or talk bad about him, but he has some anger issues to that if there was a good Christian book out there for men and their anger, I would do a little encouraging towards my husband to read it. Anyway, God has certainly tested us in '06, and I am praying that things start turning around, maybe I can learn to be me again. I need to remember the good parts about me from so long ago. I need to remember that I am not only mom, wife, friend, I am me. And God loves me enough to take me in, and that is truly all I have to remember, and strive to please him daily.