Peace Maker, Chapter 1- Conflict Provides Opportunities

I would just like to say that anything I put in quotation marks is quoted straight out of the book, and all scripture verses referred to are also recommended from the author.
So in the first chapter, conflict is described as a slippery slope. That it is!! In the "Slippery slope of conflict" people usually respond in 3 different ways. My pastor actually preached about this last Sunday. The first is Escape Responses- Suicide, Flight, and Denial. These are on the left side of the slippery slope. On the right side of the slippery slope are the Attack Responses- Murder, Litigation, and Assault. In the middle we find the Peacemaking Responses, which go from left to right; Overlook, Reconciliation, Negotiation, Mediation, Arbitration, and Accountability.
Now, we look a little deeper into each response. On the far left is the escape responses. The people who lean towards these responses are normally more interested in avoiding than solving the conflict. So they normally do one of the 3 things: Denial-"simply refuse to do what should be done to resolve a conflict." (recommended scripture from author Gen. 16:1-6;1 Sam. 2:22-25) Up next, Flight- Of course this is to run away. If you quit a job, quit talking to a friend, etc., this normally only postpones a solution to the problem. (Gen. 16:6-8) Sometimes it is okay if you need to calm down. Flight can also be okay if you are in danger. (1 Sam. 19:9-10) The last and final "escape" is Suicide- We all know what this is. The ultimate escape, or ultimate cry for help. (1 Sam. 31:4)
Attack Responses are used by people who are more interested in winning than keeping a relationship. Assault- Can be to overcome the other by verbal or physical attacks, or damaging a person financially or professionally. (Acts 6:8-15) Litigation- Taking someone to court. Making them bend to your will legally. Some lawsuits are legitimate.(Acts 24:1-26:32;Rom. 13:1-5) Most the time this will damage relationships severely, and that is why Christians are commanded to litigate within the church instead of the courts.(1 Cor. 6:1-8) Then Murder-Of Course this means killing the person who opposes you, (Acts 7:54-58); and we all know that just killing is not the only kind of murder. When we harbor contempt or anger in our hearts, that is the same in Gods eyes.(1 John 3:15; Matt. 5:21-22)
So all the Peace Making solutions are what we are suppose to shoot for. Overlook an Offense, Reconciliation, and Negotiation, are more personal solutions. Mediation, Arbitration, and Accountability are more outsourced solutions. Since all of these are brought into focus in later chapters, we just won't go there now. Because I will be posting on these in length later. There is also some more really cool stuff in this chapter I want to get to before you all get to bored to read on.
So here we are, all of the above are responses to conflict. The escape and attack responses to conflict can be held at bay if we learn to look at conflict in a biblical way. Conflict is not always bad. Instead of looking for uniformity, look for unity. Not everybody is going to agree all the time, well duh! But not all conflict is good per say. But all conflict gives you a way to Glorify God, serve others, and grow to be like Christ.
How do we Glorify God in the midst of conflict. First, trust God. Second, Obey God. Third, imitate God. Fourth, Acknowledge God. If you are focusing on these four things than you are less likely to say and do things that you may later regret. A God-centered approach to conflict resolution is if you are focusing on pleasing God, as long as you are doing those things you are less interested in the others responses, like if they are being negative. If you choose not to Glorify God in conflict, than you show that you are a pretty selfish person. When "pleasing God is more important than holding onto worldly things and pleasing yourself, it becomes increasingly natural to respond to conflict graciously, wisely, and with self control." This brings glory to God.
Serving others in the midst of conflict is, in some cases, helping them figure out a different option to the problem they are trying to overcome. Or you may have a chance to carry the others "burdens." You can provide spiritually, emotionally, or provide materials they need to help with a problem. So instead of reacting defensively when they lash out, just try and figure out how you can help with that problem. This also brings glory to God. Conflict helps bring out moments to help others trust in Jesus Christ. Because the way you handle conflict other people will see and wonder how you handle things so well. This may present a way to open the door and introducing them to Jesus Christ. Last, but not least is, growing to be more like Christ. Conflict helps point out sinful attitudes and habits in your life so you can focus on changing those also. "God uses conflict to stretch and challenge you in carefully tailored ways." this is sometimes referred to "the ABC of spiritual growth: Adversity Builds Character. If you worry less about GOING through conflict, and focus on GROWING through conflict, you will enhance that process and experience the incomparable blessing of being conformed to the likeness of Christ."
2 more parts : The 4 G's of peace making. If you are going through conflict ask yourself these questions! How can I please and Glorify God in this situation? (Glorify God) How can I take responsibility for my part in the conflict? (Get the log out of your own eye) How can I lovingly serve others by helping them take responsibility for their part in this conflict? (Gently Restore) How can I demonstrate forgiveness and encourage a reasonable solution? (Go and be reconciled)
The last part is about "stewarding conflict." To be a steward is to look out for your masters interests, regardless if it is contradicting to what you believe or not, loosely put. So to steward conflict, you must look to your master, Jesus Christ, to find the best route.
All and all the first chapter is very lengthy, however very informative. It definitely made me evaluate how I confront conflict. Then the rest of the book is going to shine even more light on all of these subjects and more. I am looking forward to sharing the rest with you.